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Tamizhum 1190 Markum

May 26, 2015 3 comments

Enna Sir, payyan indha varusham 10th ezhudhi irukkanla?

“Ada aama pa. Exam ezhuthittu avan jolly a thaan irukkan. Enakku thaan vayithula puliya karaikkidhu daily”

“Vidunga Sir. Unga payyanukku enna, nalla mark thaan vaanguvaan. Seri, Engineer a , Doctor a ? 12th la Enna stream la sekka poreenga”

“Avan friends ellam Computer Science thaan edukkaraanga. Ivanum athaan venungaraan”

“Seri adhulaye sethudunga. CS la mark vaangardhu easy nga. Enga akka payyan Biology. 183 yo 4 o thaan eduthaan.  190 kku mela poda maattangalaame”

“Adhuvum Seri thaan”

“French a Sanskrit a ? Sanskrit la llam easy a 200 vaangidlaam. Tamil lla llam 180 e kashtam. Summa adhula pottu waste pannadheenga”

 

Tamilnatla, atleast Chennai la, Pathaavadhula la irunthu Padhinonnavathu pora mukkavaasi maanavargaloda veetla nadakkara saadharna conversation thaan. Computer Science la easy marku, Tamil edutha mark poidum, patthaavadhu varaikkum tamil padichadhe podhungra manappanmai perumabaalana petrorukku irukku (payyanukku enna venum, enna padikkanumnu kekkardhilla, adhu vera vishayam). Kadasiya enna ? Mark vaanganum. Neraya vaanganum. Annan Payyan, Thangachi ponnu, Edhir veettu Ashwin , Pakkathu veettu Priya , ellatha vidayum neraya mark vaanganum. Adhukku kuruku vazhi, tamizh a paadhilaye athu vittu poidradhu.

Odanne “Naanga pudhusssa oru language a katthukkarom” “Our kids will know a new language” nnu kodi pudichittu vandhudaatheenga. Pudhu mozhi kathukkardhula thappilla. Infact evlo mozhi kathukkaromo ulagathula athana kalaacharatha pathi therinjikkalaam. Aana adhukkellam munnadi namma thaai mozhi a muzhusa therinjikkanumla? 11avadhu 12aavadhu la padichaa thaan tamizha, naanga veetla daily pesarome, enga payyan 10aavadhu varaikkum tamil thaan padichaane nnu nenaikkaravanga, avan periyavan aana apparam indha mudivu avana epdi baadhikkidhundradha yosichu paarunga.

11aavathula tamil a venaamnu sonnadhaala adhoda importance avlo thaan nra maari oru thappana abipraayam appove avan manasula form aaiduthu. Idhu poga tamil padicha “naattupuram” , French padicha royal aristocrat nra range la avana ethividradhu veetla. Apdiye padichu periyavan aagi , Paris la conference pogum bothu 11avathula padicha french a vechi ottiduvaaraam. Adhe Bonjour um Bon appétit thaane. Ellarukkum theriyum. Idhellam vida aangila mogam nammala enga vittuchu. Naan padicha school llam “Speak to me in English” nnu badge pottirunthom ellarum. Tamil la pesinaale punishment. Natural a school a english pesaravan, veetla poyum atha thaan pesaraan. So tamil la avanoda total vocabularye adhoda close aaiduthu. Pudhu Pudhu vaarthaigala enga kathuppaan ?

College mudichittu velaikku sendhu naalu peroda pesum bothu ‘maame’, ‘machi’ nnu kaalaaikkardhellam saralama varudhu. Konjam complex vaarthai engayaathu ketta artham therila. Naan onnum Sallaabam, Mandhagaasam nnu over complex words pathi sollala. Pirai, Madhi, Sitrundi, Thanikkai kooda therila. Adha vidunga. Tamil Ezhudha/Padikka ippo irukkara generation la ethana perukku theridhu. Avan kalyaana pathirikkaila irukka tamizhe inga paadhi per padikka theriyaama thaan kalyaanam pannikkaraanunga. Munnadi tamil paatu variyellam manappadama paadittu irundha gumbal ippo rendu line kku mela poradhilla. Yenna Thaamarai, Karky nnu kavinjargal neraya peru pudhu pudhu tamil vaarthaigala paatukkalla marubadiyum kondu varanumnu muyarchi pannittu varaanga. Namma payyan andha maari ‘complicated’ tamil llam therinjikku virumba maatraan.

Theatre la padam paakkum bothu, dialogue la chinna kavidhai vandha kooda, pakkathula irukkanavana artham kekkaraan. ‘Oru vaarthai Oru latcham’ llam TV la potta sutham. Rendaavadhu round kku mela namma payalukku oru vaarthaikku kooda artham therila. Avan pera avanaalaye tamizh la ezhudha therilainga. America la irunthu enna prayojanam ? Idhellam vida worstu. Avan aalu avanukku tamizhla ezhudhi kudutha love letter a en friend oruthanukku naan padichu kaatnen. Idhellam paathu sirikkardha azhardhannu therila.

Seri ellathayum vidunga. Ivan eppadiyo poittu poraan. 1190 mark eduthaan 12th la. Engineering padichachu, Velaikku poyachu, America vandhaachu, Kalyaanam Panniyachu, Kozhandhayum pethukkittachu. Apparam enna ? Pondattikku tamil aarvam konjaamavathu iruntha okay. Illa avalum “Bonjour” thaan na, porandha kozhandha gadhi enna aagarthu? Already veli naatla valarra kozhandha. Veliya english thaan pesi valara poguthu. Veetlayum “Sanjay how many times should i tell you to finish your bowl of cereal” nnu solli valatha, Tamil vaadaye irukkaadhu. Bombay heroine maari thaan tamil pesi valarum. Aana amma appa, porandhadhu Kodambakkam, padichadhu PSBB. Tamilnadu product thaan. Leave kku India vandhu “What paatti?, you dont even know how to operate an iPad” nnu sollumbothu paatikku perumaya thaan irukkum. Ullukkulla Tamil pesamaatraanenra varutham nichayam irukkum.

Idhanaala 11th la tamil edukkara ellarum tami aarvathoda valarraanga, sanskrit edukkara ellarum tamizhe theriyaama valaraangannu naan solla varla. Sanskrit eduthu padicha en friends neraya per, innum nalla tamizh pesittu padichittu thaan irukkaanga. Simple a sollapona, adhu namma thaai mozhi nra garvam varanum. Adha pesa theriyatti, padikka theriyaatti asingamnradha unaranum. Perumaya poi “I know how to speak a little tamil. But cant read or write” nnu peter vitta, adhu mallakka paduthu echi thuppara maarinnu unaranum. Naan onnum ellarayum baagam baagama silappadhigaaram, sevagasenthaamani padikka sollala. Andrada tamil a therinjikkonga. Ezhudha theriyaadha? Kathukkonga. Adhukkana muyarchi edunga. Mukkiyama ungalukke theriyatti unga pasangalukku eppadi solli thara mudiyum? Idha yosinga.

Tamizh padichu 185 maark eduthaana. Sandosha padunga. Ner ner themaa, Nirai ner pulimaa, Nirai Nirai Karuvilam, Ner Nirai Kuvilam nnu padikkara kadaisi thalaimurai nammalodadhu aaida koodathu.

 

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Categories: tamil, tanglish Tags: , ,

Men will be Men

May 24, 2010 24 comments

Arun: Dei, got your joining letter la ? July 30. Chennai thane ?

Kanagu: Ya Ya. Athe than. Shew, atleast we are in the same branch.

Arun: Ya da. College a ye kalakkina maari , office a yum kalakkanum.

Kanagu: Enna kalakkalo. Neeyavathu color colora program llam poduva. Enakku therinja ore program ‘Hello World’ thane

Arun: Dei, athellam mattere illa da. And did you check out that orkut community of our new joinee batch.

Kanagu: Kanna, orkut llam school pasanga use panrathu. I am currently only on Facebook, Twitter, Buzz you know.

Arun: Adangu da. But paravala girls use panrathu Orkut thaane. Twitterla high levela irukkarthellam onnu PSBB, illa MOP. Seri, I checked the community. Believe me, Egapatta figures da. Perellam paathale ponnu azhaga irukkumnu thonuthu.

Kanagu: Athaane paathen. I thought you went to the community to gather info about training and all. And appadi ennada pera paatha.

Arun: Archana Nair, Sulaba Malhotra, Kamini Iyer nnu ennanennavo perunga machi. Ithanaila onnu rendu koodava nalla irukkathu?

Kanagu: Kaalam bathil sollum da . Badhil Sollum. But I have a doubt. 14 years of Coed School, 4 years of Engg coll life, ithula correct pannatha ponnaya ippo correct panna pora ?

Arun: Ha Ha. I was expecting you would ask this question. You see, school la college lla llam girls will be bound by many restrictions da. When you start working, you earn.. So ponnungellam independent a think panna aarambichiduvaanga. And that is our big advantage. So, office la aal pudikkarthu Can-Can.

Kanagu: Huh. The one thing I like about you is the way you justify your inability to get a girl with some high school nonsense. Ennavo machi kudiyum kudithanamuma aana santhosham thaan.

Arun: Hmmm, you still seem skeptical. Machi ill tell you what is waiting for us in office. In case you have a good looking girl in your team or in the neighboring team, chances of you and her talking alone are very high.

For instance you’ll have tasks to be done together, you both will meet in the elevator like a million times, you’ll have lots of team lunches, team building crap sessions, outing, late night works close to deadlines, cab drops incase of those late night works, a thousand official phone calls out of which a few can be turned personal and moreover she’ll have doubts which you may solve and vice versa too. Ippo sollu machi, ivlo vaippu kudutha nee goal poda maata ?

Kanagu: Yappa ! Dei naan mattum goal pottennu vechikoyen unakku treat machi.

[ One year later]

Kanagu: Dei I was transferring data from my old phone to new. Look what I found. It is a phone conversation we had about an year ago. Appo etho thonichennu record pannen. Inikku kaalaila fulla atha kettu semma sirippu.

Arun: Dei we had lots of conversations. Which one ?

Kanagu:  [pressin play button in the phone] This one.

For instance you’ll have tasks to be done together, you both will….

Arun: HA HA.

Kanagu: Eppadiyellam emanthirukkom. Naama pesina antha stereo type azhagaana ponnukku already 6 adi oyarathula, semma bodyoda, sekka sevelnu oru boyfriend iruppanra mattera naama yosikkave illala.

Arun: Vidra Vidra. Trisha kedaikkalenna Divya. 2nd floor la, delivery team kku pudhusa vanthirukkara  fresher group la oru ponnu takkara irukkan. Patchi sollichu. Unakku than antha team antha Anand a  theriyumla, va va va va. Seekaram va.

Men will be men.

Padhin Kavanagam for Dummies

April 4, 2010 17 comments
Padhin Kavanagam for Dummies

Padhin Kavanagam for Dummies

Padhin Kavanagam is the art of doing 10 different things SIMULTANEOUSLY, as told by my Tamil teacher in the 8th Grade. ‘Dasavadhani’  is the Vada Naattu name to denote a person who is capable of the same. Ever since i heard that, i thought to myself these are all highly overrated concepts and not at all possible at least in our world. Let alone Munis and Rishis and all heavenly figures in sexy clothing. I was pretty sure these are all to-be-extinct tamil words.

All these thought until i saw it with my own eyes. That too in Chennai, in the ever crowded Mount Road. He did not look like a saint. He did not have big beards. He did not have thandai and kamandalam. He did have a latti and thoppi. He didn’t wear Kaavi, he sported Kaakhi. No prizes for guessing. It’s the traffic police inspector. Here’s Padhinkavanagam explained with examples for Dummies’ sake.

1. Keeping an eye for a Potentially Mamooling Vehicle. Yamaha R15 or Royal Enfield Thunderbird driven by 19 year old guys with French beards and Liverpool jerseys are like marinated chicken pieces ready to be fried. Always on the look out for easy cash.

2. Blocking the already madakkufied vehicle in such a way that he doesn’t take off without paying the ‘fine’. Mostly involves the easy way – removing the vehicle key or sometimes the hard way – standing right in front of the vehicle with one leg on the front tyre. All those months of training in the Training Academy pays off now.

3. Checking the Driving License of the Madakkufyee . No need to get into details like seeing whether the face matches, doubts about whether he was fully dressed while the PP photo was taken and all. Coz, it was one of them who granted those wonderful licenses. Paambin Kaal Paambariyum.

4. There is no big scope in Licenses nowadays. But big booty lies in the Vehicle insurance section. A quick check whether the date of the insurance has expired always ensures that there’ll be no regrets afterwards.

5. Nobody just surrenders without a fight or a pleading. Ranging from ‘Sir engappa yaaru theriyuma’ to ‘Sir intha thadava vitrunga sir. Please office kku time aachu’ and even to ‘Inthaanga engappa line la irukkaru, pesunga’ . So gotta be ready to talk out and take out cash  in any of these situations. One of my all time favorite small talk from a Traffic Policeman is ‘Ithellam enga pocketukku illa. Governmentkku. Paaru Billellam podren. Correct a amount kooda ezhutharen paaru’. Bill booka print panrathe ivanga thaan. Hmph.

6. While the talk is going on, billing goes on parallely. “Deenadayalan , 200 rooba , overspeed. Intha pa . Inga oru kayezhuthu podu. Inga katna 200 rooba . Courtukku pona 1000 rooba . Epdi vasathi?”

7. While all these things are happening, a sad lonely walkie talkie is shouting with all its might in his belt strap. It’ll look like they dont seem to listen to what it says. But a subconscious part of the brain is always gathering information from the call, a chennai map materializing inside his head. If that processes any words like “Accident, 2 wheeler, and any place which is 5 km from where he is standing”, then he must hurry. Accidents mean big cash. And early bird gets the worm.

8.  Checking on the Constable is another threaded process. Traffic SI or Inspectors don’t ‘catch’ cases technically. Some brave constable men run into the middle of the road, scare the guy on the bike to death and then take him to the SI . So there is a high possibility that the constable may himself pocket some side amount. Constable check is very important as it splits valuable cash.

9. Amount check is the important of all. ” Antha white color field marshall bike irukulla, athula petrol tank pouch la amount a vechittu poidunga. Naan kaila vaangarthe illa” maybe easy to say. But those intense moments when he walks to the bike and keeps the cash are too important. Afterall it was a result of a hard day’s work.

10. Standing in the roads at noon time in Chennai itself is a big achievement. So they refresh themselves by sipping onto Elaneer/Karumbu Juice/Cool Drink most of the times. The refreshments are provided free of cost by the nearby shop keepers out of their respect towards traffic police men.

This 10 item cycle goes on and on and on, till the collection for the day had reached the desired threshold value. So thinking about the fact that CCTP Inspectors are capable of super human feats, makes me feel proud. Really Proud to trod among these Padhin Kavanaga Kaavalaalis.

Please note: The Post is intended only against corrupt traffic policemen. The remaining 2.4578 % Traffic Police can safely ignore the post.

Overheard at the Elevator a.k.a Liftla Ottu Kettadhu

February 5, 2010 11 comments

I have seen many people writing about things they overheard at the elevator . Everytime i used to think these are written just to grab attention and nothing good can be overheard from a elevator. But seriously if there is one interesting place at work , it has to be the elevator . Just a few months into I.T, i have started loving the Elevator travel . It is a place where you can hear about anything and everything . Sports , Politics, Kisu Kisu , Movie Climaxes, Evan Evala sight adikkaaran adhu ithunnu motha ulaga nadappugal ellam therinjikkalaam. But it is not technically overhearing when you do it on a elevator . In that small space whatever you speak , even in your lightest whisper can be heard by others as though they hear it from a Bose Amp .

I have noted one thing about people entering the ‘lift’ . They come in , take a nice look at everybody in it mostly to assess the people inside if the left were to get stuck  . Possible a head count and then either start looking at the fan or read the ‘Instructions to follow incase of emergency’ for the umpteenth time . Idhu oru comedy nna next comedy people speaking in phones inside lifts . Giggling girls talking as soft as they can in the phone, thinking nobody can hear. Not knowing the fact that the boyfriend on the other side is audible too. “Saaptiya” “Illa pa, inikku work irukku” ” Hmmm Apparam” .

One more interesting group of people is a bunch of boys and a girl who get down at different floors. One boy keeps talking nonsense with the girl ignoring his sagaas along side. And antha ponnu erangi lift edutha odane avan friends avana paathu vidra look irukke . Appappa.  Other set of people are the self smilers. Get in Lift -> Take Mobile Phone -> Check Message -> Smile.

Finally the languages that you hear in a lift . Tamil , Telugu , Kannada, Hindi , Economic Times English, I am one grade higher than you English, Boy Girl English , Girl Girl english and most important TANGLISH

“Indian English is a recognized form of English”  said one of my soft skills faculty in a training session . I thought she was exaggerating the fact . But Wiki has a biiig article on Indian English . Eventhough Indian English has attained global popularity i must say Tamilian English has a class of its own. Ippo edhukku idha solrennu paakkareengala .  Wait, I “Overheard” a conv at the elevator today .

Girl: You are coming to the canteen no ?

Boy :Illa Illa. my Lead you know no . Athaan, Hema Parthasarathy . Semma strictu . 5 mins i come late , she makes me sit half hour extra in evening.

Girl: Oh, actually my lead was like that only . Now she is not like that . What to say…Kind of lenient .

Boy: Really? Lucky Yaar. You are staying in OMR only ?

Girl: Ya Ya. Behind that Varasakthi Vinaayagar temple.

Boy: Oh okay . My floor came . Well meet in the evening Okaya?

Lifts can be places of potential information exchange and fun . So next time you go in a lift , don’t forget to overhear 😀

Poli – [Insert some highly clichéd line here as tagline]

January 31, 2010 2 comments

Disclaimer: The characters in this post are all brain childs of the author and they bearing any similarity to real life characters maybe a an intentional coincidence. The post in mostly in tamil, so konjam konjam tamil therinjavangelukkellam konjan kashtam.

Poli actually may mean either fake or the sweet which looks like adai and is sold in Venkateswara Poli stalls across chennai . Title of the blog post in itself is a sledai . Note this word , it comes in the post again .

The story revolves around three people in all. The Hero , The Director and The Producer . Some other characters may come and go in the middle . But , not important .

Scene 1 : Producer’s House . 6:15 pm . Date not revealed.

Producer: Empa hero unakkagave oru script ready panni , nee thaan nadikkanumnu naaya peya alanjikittu irukkan namma directoru.

Hero: Enna vechu padam edukkara alavukku nambikkaya?  yaar sir adhu ?

Producer: Athaan pa , avan modhal rendu padatha unnavechu thunichala eduthaane .

Hero: Ohhh . Sir a .

[Director entering hurriedly]

Producer: Vaayya , directoru. Unga hero vandhirukkan , un scripta konjam sollu .

Director: Hero Saarr . Kadhaya mattum kelunga . Ungalo oho nnu uyartha pora padam sir ithu .

[Director narrating script to hero]

Hero: Hmmm kadha nalla thaan irukku . Padhala costume department yaara poda poreenga ?

Director: Athellam ivlo seekaram epdi saar mudivu panrathu ?

Hero: Yaara pottalum seri . Intha costly cooling class oru 7-8 vaangi vekka sollunga . Pona padathula use panna meethiye irukkum. Athayum sethu use pannikkalaam .

Director: Okay saar.

Hero: Apparam coat suit ellam pottu kurukka murukka nadandhu vandhu maadila irunthu paakara maari oru 4-5 scene vechuppom . Enakkaga illa , audiencekku pudikkum ya athaan solren .

Producer: [Vaaikullaye] “ Yen da solla maatta , kaasu podrathu naanilaa ” . Okay Okay . Neenga sonna seriyaathan irukkum .

Hero: Apparam producer sir , neenga padathula nadikkalaya ? Naan unga kooda kadaisiya nadicha padathula ungalukku semma per vaangi kuduthenla ?

Producer : Aamam Aamam . Atha yaaruppa marukka mudiyum. Athaan youtube, facebook ellam en manatha vangitaye . Naanu , next padam nadikkaren pa unkooda . Ithu venaam .

Hero: Mmmm , Seri . Enakkenna . Mukkiyamaana Vishayam . Padathoda peru enna vekkarthu ?

Director: Sir , intha kadha 5 varushathukku munnadi naane sondhama ezhudhinathu . Original Script sir . So adhukke……

Hero: Stop Stop Stop . Enna sonnenga ? Original Script . Hmmm ‘Original Sin’ maari semmaya irukke peru , athaye vechiduvom .

Producer: Oh besha vekkalaame . Apparam Englishla per vechadhukku extra kaasu ungappana tharuvaan. Vattikellam Kadan vaangi edukkara padam da . Sothappidatheenga .

Hero : Vatti . Vari . Kishthi . Intha maari en vekkka koodathu .

[Director now says the magical film title]

Hero: Wow . Semma Title sir . ‘Original’ layum , Kadan Vaanginathayum sethu oru Sledai ya title vechirukkenga sir . Super .

Director: Directa title a vechida mudiyaathu . Enakku therinja ‘Vathikuchi Varadhachalam’ nnu oru Josiyar irukkaru . Avarkitta intha title okayvannu kekkanum.

Scene 2 : Vathikuchi Varadhachalam’s Ashram. 10: 25 am .

Match Stick: Ennayya pudhu padama ?

Director: Aamanga aiyya . Intha peru okayva paarunga .

Match Stick: Hmmm intha perla pizhay irukku . Sani Seventh Veetla Saplam kaal pottuttu Sitting . So title a konjam thookkala veinga.

Director : Thookalanna ?

Match Stick: Modhal Ezhuthu Nedillll . Azhuthaam .

Director : Yov . Tamizhla arthame maari poidumya . Oruthanukkum puriyave puriyaathu .

Match Stick : Arivilla unakku , Arivilla . Solratha muzhusa kelu . Englishla nedil aakidunga . Tamilla appadiye vechikkalam . Jenangalukkum conpessan varathu .

Director: Adadada. Dei hero , paathiya nammaala . Peru maathanadhunaala paaru . Mavane padam pichikittu oda poguthu .

Scene 3 : Hero’s house . Time not important .

[Apparently shooting and all is over . Some trouble with the release date]

Producer: Padam release aaguma aagatha . Ore kelvi .

Director : Saar , adha enna avlo easy a kettuteenga . Date mudivu panrathu evlo kashtam theriyumla .

Producer : Yov , paatellam release panniyachu ya , padatha seekaram vitta thaane .

Director: Aamam paatu periya paattu . Ooru kaari thuppudhu.

Hero: Neellam directora da . Neeye padatha pathi thappu thappa pesura.

Director: Varra vaaram panlaamnu paatha Rendu Periya Comedy padam release aaguthu , namma panna potta kaasa kooda edukka mudiyathu .

Producer: Ayyayyo venave venam .

Director: Seri rendu vaaram kazhichu panlaamna , saniyan ennoda periya director oruthan romance padamllam eduthu udraan .

Producer: Ayyayo ponnunga kootamellam anga thaan pogum . Patellam vera nalla irukku. Namma pada paatta kelu . Karumam. Yaarya andha music director a recommend pannathu . Cha . Seri Athuvum venaam .

Hero: Idea ! Naama yen renduthukku naduvula release panna koodathu . Oru vaaramavathu light a vasool varumla .

Director: Apparam namma pambi pambi release panromnu intha oor nammala kaari thuppadhu ?

Hero : Athuva mukkiyam . Release panrom . Panniye aagarom.

And thus the trio decided a date and had big plans of box office opening and all. Lesser they know what was going to happen to the movie after release . Well see that part of the conversation later .

Making of a Mega Serial

August 19, 2009 7 comments

This infinite abyss of vettiness has pushed me into watching Mega Serials. I already am a fan of many English Series but Tamil Mega Serials which air during Dinner Time caught my attention only in the recent times. Everytime i see an episode of these serials, i wonder how much effort the story writer or the director would have put for this particular show . And thus this blog post takes shape . Every serial now has a Ex Top Kollywood Actress in the lead role . This is one more thing i don’t understand ; All series have strong female leads while there is no importance given to Men . Men in tamil series are usually old and drunkard father, useless husband, arrogant brother, cunning brother-in-law,  comedian sidekick etc. no strong roles given . And they call us MCP . Duh. Alright Alright now moving to our post . It is a simulation of what possibly happens in a shooting spot of a Nedumthodar .

[Heroine arrives in Innova half hour late, while the rest of the crew is drinking tea and not to mention the story writer is waiting for inspiration to strike]

Heroine: Hi director , innikku shot enna ?

Dir: Onnum illa madam. Unga thangachi unga sothula pangu kettu sanda podranga .

Heroine: Atha thaane pona vaaram eduthom .

Dir : Athu unga modhal thangachi Vimala , Ippo sanda podrathu unga rendavathu thangachi Kamala .

Heroine: Oh . Ok Sir . Seekaram shooting mudichidalam , enakku pala appointments irukku .

Dir: Dei Madam kku touch up pannunga da . Dialogue oru thadava padichu kaatidunga .

Asst . Dir : Madam inthaanga unga dialogue .

Heroine : ‘Ippadi aniyaayam panriye di paavi

Sir oru half hour time kudunga , dialogue memorize pannanum .

Sir , namma episode half hour la . En scene poga innikku vera yaar scenellam irukku ?

Dir : Unodathu mattum thaan ma .Half hour runtime a irunthaalum , advertisement llam poga 15 mins thaane footage time .

Heroine : Seri , 15 mins intha shotukku adhigam thaane .

Dir : Cha Cha . Neenga kovama unga dialogue solreenga . Unga face close up onnu podrom . Apram oru flip horizontal . Konjam Camera va shake panrom . Minnal effect podrom . Kadal la alaiyellam nikkudhu , Paravayellam parakkama pause aaguthu , roadla vandiyellam odama kedakkuthu , indha footage llam podrom . Apparam unga thangachi pesum bothu thirumbavum ithe sequence follow panrom . Aana namma inga oru twist vekkarom . Ellam reverse la oduthu !

Ithu mattumillame background sound . ‘Ho ohh , oh hoooo , ohoohohoh‘ . ‘ Jum ja Jum ja Jum ja jumja jum ja ‘ . ‘ Papapapaaaa, papapaaaa ‘ . Aprom unga perla oru rap . ‘ Here come arasi , she’s the man ‘ ‘ Yo people ‘ . Intha maarilam bg la asatharom .

Opening song oru 2.30 + shot oru 10.00 + special effects 2.30 . Avlo thaan episode over .

Heroine : Romba nallathu director .

Dir: Madam, take porathukku munnadi innoru matter . Innikku namma serial 1200 vathu episode . So openingla oru cake vetra scene vechirukkom . Unga 2 thangachinga , auto otrare andha kozhundhanaar , apram namma kudikaara gopi , appa sir , villan thambi ellarum serndhu cake vetramaari . Apparama sandaikku poidlam .

Heroine : Cake vetna porumla ? Cake Sappadra maarinna en dietitian a thaan call panni kekkanum .

Dir: Vetna podhum ma . Vetnale podum .

Dei, Ungala ellam modhalla vetnum da . Velinaatlellam evlo yosichu , plan panni , season 1 season 2 , season finale, Fall Break nnu release pannittu irukkan . Neenga ennanna setukku vandhu than kadhaye yosikkareenga . ‘Dr. Who‘ llam 1963 la irunthu oduthu , ippo varaikkum 750 episode thaan vandhirukku . Aana namma Kolangal , Arasi llam ippove 700 touch panni stronga poittu irukku . Villana pathu ‘ Vandhutan paaru sandalan , Kattaila poravan , Abhi seendalanna ivanukku thookame varathu’ nnu solra thaaimaargal irukkara varaikkum indha serialkkelam mudive kedayathu’ .

Kolling Time

July 13, 2009 12 comments

Blog, fish tank maari . Food podaama iruntha meenellam sethu poidum . Idhukkagave appappo oru post pottu blog a uyiroda vechirukka vendiyirukku . It’s been ages since i blogged. Coz i didnt get any damn topic to talk about. Suddenly oru thought. Kaila vennaya vechittu neikku alairomennu . So indru naam alasappogum topic ‘Fighting Boredom’ . Or as i say Kolling the time .

Few students from our class have taken the MS route and are waiting to go to the US soon.  Some more guys have already joined jobs mostly in B’lore and Chennai . College la irukkara varaikkum oru message kooda anuppadha Dogellam ‘ Hi , this is So-n-So , I am leaving to B’Lore for work . This is my new number’ nu kaduppadikarthukkaagave oru message anupparaanunga. Adha vidunga. This leaves us with the fair amount of people who are waiting for work to start . The author actually falls/lies/vizhunthu-kedakkarar in this category . This post is aimed at that select population of people .

Namma Vadivel sonna maari Chumma irukkarathu ulagathulaye romba kashtamaana vishayam . But once you face it and live with it you can master it . So here are my 10 steps to Murder Boredom.

10. Set Top Box: If you don’t have any Direct-To-Home connections please get one . Beleive me you cant watch Kolangal and Arase daily . Appadiye Discovery channel oru ‘Future Weapons’ , AXN la oru ‘So you think you can dance’ ippadi paathomna arivum valarum , time pass aana maariyum irukkum .

9. Movie Download: If you are not a big time movie watcher better try to become one . Movies are a big timepass and ya they give you something to ‘Peter’ about . ‘Dei , i saw that Wrestler movie that day. Mickey Rourke Acting chance illa la’ – Meaning ‘ I downloaded and saw the movie Wrestler , What about you ‘ .

8. Blog: This is a bit too much , but you can actually blog about some random nonsense and pester your friends to read it . Shoo Shoo shut up guys i dont write nonsense . Hmmm if you are devoid of topics, take the evergreen route ‘College Life’ is there and then ‘The last movie i saw’ is there and ya the latest topic ‘R.I.P. MJ 😦 ‘ is there . So make yourselves comfortable and write something .

7.Useless Mail: You can actually join some no-good yahoo group which sends so called ‘funny-pics’ to your mailbox . Will serve as a morning warmer . Uh put a filter for the words ‘Cute , Cats , Dogs’ etc coz most of the time you’ll be looking at some chinese baby photos with some newborn kittens . Annoying at many times.

6.Kootu Sadhi: Try to meet up with ‘Like’ friends who are also vetti . Vetti+Vetti= Great Freaking Timepass . You can talk about absolutely anything from Obama to Vettaikaaran to Megan Fox. Killing time one topic at a time 😀

5.Times of India: Please subscribe to TOI or DC . Don’t buy hindu for god’s sakes . Does Hindu have crucial info like which-actor-is-going-out-with-whom and all that stuff . No . So get one of these two papers and you already would have killed half your time.

4.Games: If you are a fan of computer games then well and good you wouldn’t have come to my blog on the first place if not i have an idea . If you have successfully accomplished Step 6: Kootu Sadhi then life becomes easier. Get a pack of cards , one coke 2 liter bottle and some snacks . Sorgam . My personal advice is to get a carrom board . Imba entertainment .

3. Sleep: Thookatha vida oru sirandha timepass enna irukka mudiyum . Veetla AC iruntha pottittu nimmadhiya thoongunga . Sleeping will increase our working capability aan . Some idiots have told . So sleep well .

2 .Twitter: Twitter sema fun . If your friends are giving useless boring status updates which you dont understand most of the time , dont worry ; follow some famous people at twitter . Take me for example , i follow @KimKardashian , @aplusk(Ashton Kutcher) etc . Its great to see what these guys update . I mean ‘ I am feeling better today’ , ‘Off to airport’ and all that crap . So you can console yourself that more vettier people are there in the planet .

1. Facebook: People who dont have a FB account close this tab right now . FB is the big daddy of all things which eat time . You can

  • Use brilliant , AI mastered applications like ‘ What color are you’ , ‘When will you die’ , ‘ What element are you’ . Beats the living hell out of you .
  • Look at your friends  giving mind boggling updates such as ‘ I shouldn’t have done that . I regret it ‘ , ‘I will not be happy any more, but that doesn’t matter, there are many other things in this world’ and such random stupidity.
  • Take noob quizzes which even a 7 year old will ace and then publish it with a Happy Smiley as status .
  • Play great games like Mafia Wars and say ‘ I am looking for a Blue Ribbon , I am looking for 5 of Spades ‘ and whatever you like .

and so on .

So i just gave you a dash of what Step 8 looks like . Experience the others yourselves . Don’t thank me yet . Proud to be Vetti .